Thursday, 9 September 2010
As a little shout out to my pals over at rad food blog Dinnergeddon I take a look into cartoon characters and their rather unhealthy obsessions with food. These are some of the worst cartoon food addicts who need help:
MONTEREY JACK : Cheese
I guess being a mouse named after a type of cheese this would be inevitable, but this guy LOVES his cheese. It's like crack to the little guy. He's gotta have it, no matter how many toilet plungers get shot at him. Are plungers like humane mouse traps or something?
WIMPY : Hamburgers
This guy is a stone cold hustler for a hamburger, be stealing, taking out loans or resorting to prostitution, he will get his burger one way or another.
SONIC : Chili dogs
For no reason at all Sonic loves the chili dogs. It doesn't tie in with the games or anything. I guess he just loves the yummy goodness.
But don't worry kids, he knows how to stay healthy.
THE TURTLES : Pizza
A very well established food addiction right... but this video shows the downright depravity of their pizza addiction. Seriously, these guys would do terrible things in dark alleyways for a slice of quatro fromagio, but probably nothing darker or more degrading than this song.
POPEYE : Doesn't care as long as you pay him!
You may think that this man is all about the healthy goodness of spinach but Popeye is actually addicted to MONEY! Give the man a big stack of cash and he will sell whatever crap you want him to! Popeye selling Campbell's soup... I feel so dirty now.
OFFICER BIG MAC : His own vital organs
We're through the looking glass here people! I know the Hamburgeler needs it so bad he resorts to crime but Officer Big Mac, the head cop in Macdonaldsland, is so full on he will EAT HIS OWN HEART OUT for your love. If someone sent me this Valentine message I would be rather afraid. You can say 'I give you my heart' or something like that but you don't think of them physically pulling it out, but this just makes me think of a man with a burger face gnawing away at his own chest. Wrong on many levels.